Why I'm not allowed to talk to clients.

Actual conversation excerpts from a conversation with a client about recent updates to their site:

(this was all in a jovial tone, nothing serious was being discussed at this point)
Them: This was never in the proposal!
Me: There was a proposal? All I got was a napkin with some writing on it. It was in a language I didn't understand, I had to hire someone to translate the napkin for me.
Them: It was actually sanskrit
Me: Ah yes, that's right, I actually got a tablet, with some etchings on it
Them: And you didn't know how to interpret all the little "A"'s on it.
Me: Yes and all the little outlines of buffalo. They had buffalo back then, in Egypt, right?
Them: Yes, water buffalo
Me: Ah, right, they swam in the Nile all the time
Them: Well the alligators had to eat something
Me: But what did they do with the fur... ah yes, that's why the toothpick was invented
Them: Maybe they just let it rot
Me: Ooh, no, it was the first form of flossing!
Them: Yes, early dental floss!

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